Rear Admiral by Nathan Burgoine

Russ is intrigued when his friends tell him they know a former porn star and that he’ll be attending their next wine tasting get together. Curious, Russ looks up Dom Masters online and is blown away by the size of the man, so much so that he impulsively orders the Rear Admiral, a dildo molded from the star himself.

Frustrated, Russ is unable to achieve the full Dom Masters experience before the big night (though it’s not for a lack of trying).

Needless to say, the ruggedly handsome star (call me Matt) is a big hit at the party. He strikes up a conversation with Russ, the only other single guy there, and they chat about life and how Matt is in town to help his invalid mother. Russ happens to work in an assisted living facility and gives Matt a referral for a caregiver who might help.

Later at home, Russ is finally able to successfully take the full rubber replica of the man he hit it off with earlier in the evening.

Matt wants to thank Russ for the help with his mom, so he brings over some pizza and they curl up on the couch to watch a scary movie. There is definitely a spark between them, and the night is finished off with a kiss.

They make plans for another evening together, but maybe one not so chaste. Their chemistry is electric, and Russ finds himself in Matt’s bed where he rises to the challenge of Matt’s prodigious talent. It’s far better than any fantasy because the two of them together are the real deal. A happy ending indeed.

For an erotic tale about huge dildos and well-hung porn stars, I found this short story surprisingly sweet. Don’t get me wrong, it’s crazy sexy, but the way Russ and Matt meet, and converse, and hang out, is completely charming and totally down-to-earth. I liked watching these characters fall for each another, and if one of them just so happens to have an enormous dick, well… all the better.

Rear Admiral is a terrific short featuring two nice guys, a little bit of humor, and a lot of romantic heat.